liberalville--the merry old land of oz

(Scarecrow) I could wile away the hours
Conferrin' with the flowers
Consultin' with the rain
And my head I'd be scratchin'
While my thoughts were busy hatchin'
If I only had a brain.

I'd unravel any riddle
For any individ'le
In trouble or in pain.

(Dorothy) With the thoughts you'd be thinkin'
You could be another Lincoln
If you only had a brain.

(Scarecrow) Oh, I would tell you why
The ocean's near the shore
I could think of things I never thunk before
And then I'd sit and think some more.

I would not be just a nuffin'
My head all full of stuffin'
My heart all full of pain.
I would dance and be merry
Life would be a ding-a-derry
If I only had a brain.

Sometimes, I truly think that the modern liberal occupies a sort of parallel universe very similar to the Merry Old Land of Oz.
Ha, ha, ha
Ho, ho, ho
And a couple of tra-la-la's
That's how we laugh the day away
In the Merry Old Land of Oz!

How else does one explain the following:

1. It is a proven fact that Christian conservatives are significantly more generous with their time and treasure than are secular liberals, yet liberals continue to falsely portray themselves as more compassionate than conservatives.
2. It is a proven fact that the minimum wage hikes promoted by liberals cause unemployment and hurt the poor, particularly poor blacks, yet liberals continue to falsely portray themselves as a friend of the poor and a friend of blacks.
3. It is a proven fact that the gun control laws supported by liberals cause violent crime to increase, yet liberals continue to falsely portray gun control laws as being helpful to society.
4. It is a proven fact that tax cuts stimulate the economy, create jobs, reduce unemployment, and help all Americans to create personal wealth, yet liberals continue to push for tax increases to help the poor.
5. It is a proven fact that embryonic stem cell research has been a 100% failure, while adult stem cell research, umbilical cord stem cell research, and amniotic fluid stem cell research have all produced many exciting successes in the field of stem cell research. Despite all of that, liberals continue to falsely claim that embryonic stem cell research is the only research that offers any hope to the sick.
6. It is a provable historic fact that our Founding Fathers never intended for there to be a separation of church and state in this country, as defined by the modern liberal. Yet the modern liberal continues to falsely claim that "separation of church and state" is in the Constitution.
7. It was the Republican Party that freed the slaves, pushed for Reconstruction, passed the 14th-16th Amendments to the Constitution, got the Civil Rights Act of 1964 passed, decreased black poverty in the 90's and beyond, increased black ownership of small business in that same time period, and increased the personal wealth of all poor people during the current decade. All of that happened despite fierce Democrat opposition, yet liberals continue to falsely claim that the Democrat Party is the appropriate home of black voters.
8. Liberals are pro-choice when it comes to murdering unborn babies, but anti-choice when it comes to choosing the best school for your child. Liberals are pro-life when it comes to murderers and rapists on Death Row, but anti-life when it comes to unborn babies and comotose white women. Liberals are for partial-birth abortion, in which the doctor kills the baby by punching a hole in his skull and sucking out the brains, but they are against using physical coersion against captured Islamofascist terrorists. Liberals are for strip searching blue-haired old ladies at airports, but against any action which would make Muslim airline passengers the least bit uncomfortable. Liberals are for Muslim airline passengers performing Islamic rituals in airports before getting on an airplane (just like the terrorists do), but they are against school children praying in the name of Jesus at graduation ceremonies.
9. Liberals believe that freedom of speech gives high school students the right to wear T-shirts at school that say "F__You!", but that this same freedom does not extend to students who want wear a T-shirt saying that homosexuality is a sin.
10. Liberals believe that any and all cockamamie ideas that spring into their minds automatically become rights specifically guaranteed by the Constitution, and that conservative attempts to hold to the original intent of the Founding Fathers is automatically fascism.

I could go on, but I think that you get the point. Pres. Reagan once said that liberalism is the passionate belief in things that just aren't so. Hondo-Watch, a secular progressive who sometimes posts comments on this site, once said that liberals PERCEIVE themselves to be smart, compassionate, tolerant, peaceful, and loving, and that whether their perception is right or wrong is irrelevent. Their PERCEPTION is their REALITY. Good grief! So that's how they laugh the day away in The Merry Old Land of Oz!